The two most powerful words, when you’re in struggle, ‘me too.’ – Brene’ Brown
Growing up and for the bulk of my marriage I did not maintain close friendships. That is one of the side effects of living a false life, pretending things are fine when they are anything but fine. Without friendship, a confidant, things stay bottled up inside, brewing. Very scary inside my head sometimes. I was raised to believe quite a lot of things I no longer believe, but see the effects these untrue things still have on my life.
I believed, as a woman, I was less than a man, dependent on a man and unable to survive without a man. I believed I had no value unless I was working on something every waking moment, and most anything would do, from changing a diaper, to working at a job, to running kids to school to grocery shopping, as long as it involved activity. Sitting on the veranda, enjoying the view or the like, were not on the list. I harbored tremendous guilt for day dreaming and wishing my life were something other than what it was. Brutal.
Currently I am challenged by learning new healthier habits, like maintaining sweet friendships, sharing what is going on in all my vulnerability while reaching out to others. I take breaks to mess about with my flowers, listen to meditation music and enjoy the company of people I love. It is a step and I’m taking it. As always, I consider you and what you may be going through and whatever that may be, I’ll tell you, ‘Me too.’ Namaste’